Lately, I have been contemplating the role of women in the traditional Christian family as compared to what my current experience of my own role in my own family is, and I've come to a few revelations. One, I grew up wishing to be rescued. I wanted to be a princess with a prince who would ride up on his white steed and rescue me from whatever problem I had at the time, whether it was doing the dishes, a car breaking down or a fight with my mom. I grew up believing (and not too incorrectly) that I, as a woman, am made to be cherished, treasured, and protected. Not because women are the weaker sex, but because it is through that protection that our hearts can flourish and provide all they are meant to provide to the world. And I didn't expect my prince to just fix emergencies. I just knew my prince would provide for my every need (and maybe a few wants!), both physical and emotional, meaning I would only have to work if I wanted to. My prince would be there for every rescue situation.
But now, I'm in a conundrum, which is the second realization I've come to. Because as it happens, my prince is usually pretty good at rescuing me from fights with my mom and all those times I'm an emotional wreck. But otherwise, I often feel like I'm the one doing a lot of rescuing. Justin has a bathroom accident, I take care of it. The bus can't make it to pick Justin up, I move my schedule around to go get him. Add to that that I have to do laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, work 3 part time jobs, etc., and life gets crazy very quickly and I feel like I need to be rescued simply from the busyness and chaos. But most of those physical things, Justin can't save me from. It's not that he doesn't try-he does! But when you are getting people who volunteer to help you around the house, you are grateful but don't expect (and rightfully so!) for them to be incredibly regular, so cleaning often falls on me by sheer process of elimination.
And then, add to all of that, I'm not sure any more I want to be completely rescued. Doesn't mean I don't like the feeling of someone else taking care of things, but I want to be a strong woman, I want to be respected for who I am and what I do, and it doesn't seem like that happens with damsels in distress. In a world where men are made uncomfortable by tears and women are expected to be both strong in the workplace and nurturing mothers and wives at home, the role I'm looking to try to fill is complicated at best, increasingly overwhelming at worst. I'm not sure yet what all this means or where I'm going from here, but I know one thing: I know longer have the time to be a damsel in distress!
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